via: Relevant Magazine - Lennon Noland
4 Fatal Relationship Mistakes
The only thing that hurts more than a broken heart is having your heart broken again. In the aftermath of breakups we often feel we are simply at the hands of forces beyond our control.
Why does God allow us to experience something that feels perfect only to have it fall apart? How does a relationship that starts so great end up so bad?
Most relationships are destined for breakup even before they begin because of how we approach love. In fact, how we love is just as important as who we love.
Based on my own experience and a decade as a minister to students and young adults I contend that our how is broken. Here are four common mistakes we make early on in relationships that often set them up for failure:
1. Start a Relationship Because of Physical Attraction
Not that physical attraction shouldn’t be a reason we date someone; it just shouldn’t be the reason. Often we begin a relationship assuming that if we are madly attracted to someone, then it’s worth the gamble for the chance to be with them.
Larger issues of compatibility are set aside for later examination because we are too consumed with sexual fervor to consider the weightier issues.
This is not to say this attraction always leads straight to sex, but we tend to think the first kiss has told us all we need to know about whether or not this was worth pursuing.
2. Read Into Everything
“Ignorance is bliss” was probably a phrase coined to describe a new relationship floating on the clouds of physical chemistry. Everything seems amazing.
In such an ecstatic haze, every commonality we share seems divine:
“You like coffee, too? With milk!? Unbelievable.”
“You watch The Walking Dead!? I’m so into that show! WE ARE THE SAME PERSON.”
Issues fundamental to lasting relationships may not have even been discussed at this point: faith, worldview, beliefs about family, etc.
This can cause huge problems later.
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